Cruel Crashes

Fri evening, after the girls left with their dad, I was whining to DD1, about Always hurting. Whining to someone who can barely get out of bed?? Selfish much??

I’m just so over it. I want to start whacking off body parts!! I’m tired of the pain!! The pain adds to my depression, which adds to the pain, which adds to the depression…. And, not to mention the anxiety eating me alive at times.

If I didn’t have God to cling onto, I’d have offed myself decades ago. Trust me, I’d made many a plan.

DD1 is such a good cheerleader! She reminds me I have valid reasons for the pain, I’m not just whining for pity’s sake.

Somehow we got on the subject of car wrecks. And I said, “Oh, no wonder I hurt all the time! I’ve had about 11!” Then started counting.

Not any of mine, thank God! BTW; the driver walked away!

1. Almost 5, Dad spun out, made 3 donuts, almost hit a pole. Technically it wasn’t a car wreck, but it threw me all around the car.
2. 5, I was across and down the street, looking at some horses. Dad called, I turned around to come, saw cars, so went back to horse watching. Dad hollered again. This time I knew my butt would be in a sling, so I turned, and blindly ran. Smack dab into a car door. The handle broke my nose. Plus the eye patch was so sporty, afterwards!!
3. 11, was in the back of my cousin’s car. We didn’t see the car parked directly in the road, since it was a dark, country night. Did you not have your lights on?? I don’t know! I was 11, and yakking my head off!!
4. Still 11, still in neck brace, some kid named Bobby, thought it would be hilarious!! to pull my chair out from under me, as I sat down. I wish we had known then that you could sue people!!
5. Gave myself a break for a few years… 17, just had gotten my mom’s old car. Spun out in the sugar sand, and smacked a huge oak tree!! Fat lip, and neck brace once again. This time I made it a fashion statement tho! I bought a bunch of socks, in different shades of purple. Cut each one up, for a brace cover. Voila! I was hurting, but my outfits sure coordinated!!
6. 21, got off work, tired as all get out, and drove to Joyous’ house for the week end. Yeah, tired driving es NO bueno!! Couldn’t pay the ticket, cuz I had to quit work. Bye, bye license.
7. 22, dark night, NYE, with my boyfriend, later husband, Sweet Friend. It was raining, and he was so tired, he asked me to drive. I still was license-less from exactly a year ago! To the day!!
8. Once I got pregnant, I was a MUCH more careful driver! No wrecks with girls in the car. Whew!! But, went to work in Tampa, and of course, had a wreck. NOT my fault this time!! Hurray!! Still a neck brace, tho.
9. About 18 months later, another big, not my fault smack. Beginning to hate chiropractors’ offices, and even driving, at this point!

Well, I thought it was about 11, anyway. Am I forgetting any??

Well, as a matter of fact, yes. Today Mama told me, “What about the time I hit the curb, and you flew out the door, onto the road?” Whaaaaa??? I had no conscious memory of that one!

It really does seem as if there were a few more. But those 10 are plenty enough reasons why my neck, and back always hurt!!

Oh yeah, not to mention my 3 full out face plants, in the last 8 years. The 2nd one broke a few vertebrae.

Okay, so #4, was not a car wreck, it just had the same effect as 1.

And my large bosoms, which add to the neck, and back pain in a mighty way!!

So, when I say I’m hurting people, I’m NOT kiddin!!

Can we please skip the recitation of your arthritis ills today?? Please?? Alright, fine.